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One Day at HQ - By Lena

Medion: You guys never told me the story of how you got past that Vandal over at.... Quonos?
Julian: *downs some beer* Yeah, it was at Quonos. He wasn't any Galm, but it was a pretty good battle.
Synbios: Man! We didn't tell you that yet?! Awww it was great!
Julian: Ha! You're only sayin' that 'cause you didn't get killed!
Synbios: Oh c'mon Julian, like that'd happen. I had all you guys with me!
Dantares: And thank goodness for that!
Synbios: Yeah, yeah, listen up Medion, it was very very cool. See, Dantares was afraid of the town--
Dantares: MOST of us were!
Grace: I was merely concerned-
Synbios: Anyway, we were edgy, and Julian was missing, so King Benetram asks me and Gra--
Grace: "Grace and I" Lord Synbios, not the other way around.
Julian: *sigh*
Synbios: -_- He asks, *enunciates* Grace and I, *goes back to normal* to go check the town, you know, just scout it. So we go and do that, and the awesomest th--
Grace: "awesomest?"
Julian: Will you just let him go?!
Dantares: Lord Synbios' grammar shouldn't be allowed to degenerate, Sir Julian.
Julian: He's just trying to tell a story!
Medion: *laughs lightly*
Synbios: *ahem*. We see these spooky things happen! Like at this one house....
---meanwhile, at the Vandal Afterlife Hotel----
**Slogan: Home for defeated Vandals of all levels! Now with Baths!**
Quonos Vandal: I KNEW I should've picked "Immortality Type 1" on the Vandal Extra's Form WPL820!!
Vandal 1: *playing cards* We all learned that the hard way.
Vandal 2: *also playing* Eh. But who's gonna pay the extra tax they charge for that eh?
Vandal 3: *watching TV* Ain't THAT the truth.
Vandal 4: *painting* Preach on brother!
Quonos Vandal: Aaaaarrrrrgggg!! But this wasn't even my fault! I rightly owned the town! Those evil, meddling humans and their Monk!
Vandal 4: Wazzat? A Monk? Man, them monks 'been a real pain for us Vandals! Wha happened?
Quonos Vandal: Well see, I was in my mansion in this little town of Quonos. I was minding my own business even, just cleaning up the house because my lazy servant Litches never did anything... and all of a sudden, the Kyon-shi outside get up and start fighting! I figured there was a tresspasser, and went to the window, sure enough, a bunch of punk humans and a monk with his Orb of Elbesem were there, so I did what any privacy wanting Vandal would do, I sent my Kyon-shi after them!
---Back at HQ---
Synbios: We bravely entered the Graveyard, and we see Julian of all people! He had a monk with him, that was Khan.
Khan: *walking by* What is it?
Medion: Oh, they were just telling me the Quonos story.
Khan: Really? *sits down*
Synbios: Uh...ok, and so, there's Julian and Khan, and Julian goes all crazy about revenge for his old man--
Julian: My "old man" ?! And I wasn't going crazy about it!
Obright: More like berserk maybe.
Julian: -_- You are *so* asking for it Obright. *drinks some more* I was sure Galm would've been in that house... it was his type.
Synbios: Suddenly, all these zombies got up from the ground! I was pretty spooked at that point!
Khan: I was unscathed by the Kyon-shi, they were merely people under a terrible curse.
Julian: That was about when the cavalry arrived.
Dantares: Yes, we were prepared to do battle with the Kyon-shi, in order to protect everyone.
Khan: But battling them was not necessary. With Synbios' help, I was able to use the Elbesem Orb to free the poor souls.
Julian: We let Khan take care of the deadites--
Khan: Kyon-shi. "Deadite" is a term unrelated to our adventure.
Julian: Right. *drinks* While we took care of the mindless skeletons and those bat-things. We eventually made our way to the door...
---at VA Hotel---
Vandal 1: *@%^& You cheater!! *throws down cards*
Vandal 2: You're a sore loser, eh!
Vandal 3: So, he had an Orb with him?
Quonos Vandal: Yeah, and they wiped my Kyon-shi clean...*sniffs, wipes away tears on sleeve*
Vandal 1: *takes cards again, shuffles* This time I'M dealing!
Vandal 2: Suit yourself, eh. Hey, what happened with those humans and their monk, eh?
Vandal 4: Think you can go on with the story?
Quonos Vandal: *nods* So, expecting their company, I hobbled to make my home DECENT and presentable, but there was little time, and I didn't even have tea ready, so I told those lazy good-for-nothing servants of mine to block off some of the dirtier rooms and clean up the main hall and I went into my room upstairs to get the tea and look for my Property Deed....
---back at HQ---
Masqurin: --And this skeleton comes ROLLING down the stairs! I barely jumped over it!
Dantares: I can't help it if he tripped! It wasn't my fault!
Hayward: You coulda stopped him Dan-man! When he arrived on the last step, he was reaching for me in private spots!
Medion: o_O
Obright: Ho, ho! I remember that! Hayward jumped atop the table and squealed, 'Get that perv away from me!'
Hayward: *knocks Obright upside the head*
Irene: I kick skull-head.
Hayward: Ya see? 'Least someone around here was concerned for our safety.
Julian: You guys should've been up higher on the stairs, you were our backup for goodness sake.
Cybel: It's kind of hard to follow when those in front are practically raining down enemies.
Julian: *drinks beer*
Synbios: I was SO excited! We reached the upstairs bedroom, and it was really really quiet. Julian and I took opposite ends of the door *demonstrates* like this, imagine Julian was standing on that side, and we look at each other, then Julian nods to the others, and he starts telling me stuff.
Julian: I whispered that the Vandal, even though it wasn't Galm, was probably pretty powerful, and we ought to be careful, and plan something.
Dantares: Lord Synbios didn't seem to pay much heed though.
Masqurin: I still don't know why we had to go into that room one-by-one, Julian.
Cybel: And the "diamond formation?"
Julian: It's to avoid wide-range magic! You guys just don't appreciate my tactics. What I'D like to know is why Syn charged in like that...
---at VA Hotel---
Quonos Vandal: I'd just remembered where I put the Deed when this maniac kid came charging THROUGH the door!
Vandal 3: Ouch.
Quonos Vandal: That wasn't all though, he was screaming this insane battle cry, "TAAAAAAAAAAA?!?!" Completely scared the daylights out of me. Completely.
Vandal 1: Freakin' pscyho, that kid. *about to put down a card, hesitates, gets a different card, changes his mind, puts down original card*
Vandal 2: It's those videogames eh? Makes 'em violent, eh. *puts down winning card* Looks like I won again eh?
Vandal 1: #^@&*@$@^!!!!!
Quonos Vandal: Yeah...and him and his buddies go and give me a beat-down! And I never got to show them the deed! *holds up property deed in hand* I bet the freaks robbed my house, let my pet Ratchet loose....*starts to cry* I loved my pet Ratchet...
Vandal 3: Well, it's all in the past now buddy.
Vandal 4: Yeah man, chill, it'll be OK.
Quonos Vandal: Yeah I know, but I still think sometimes, you know, If I'd only shown them the deed and that kid hadn't scared me into fighting back...
Vandal 3: Hold up! Jerry Springer's on!
Vandal 4: Move over foo! I've been waiting for today's show!
Quonos Vandal: Yeah? What's it about?
Vandal 4: 'Bout these people that're having relationships with their dads/moms, brother's wives, people that turn out to be transsexuals, hookers, strippers and characters that don't exist!
Vandal 1: Whoa, talk about messed up! Characters that don't exist, geez.
Quonos Vandal: Shut up man, we're trying to watch!
Vandal 2: Increase the volume there, eh.
---back at HQ---
Khan: In the end, we were successful in freeing the whole town from the Vandal's grasp.
Medion: *claps* That was an amazing adventure Synbios, Julian.
Julian: *drinks beer* Yeah, it was a good workout.
Synbios: Not to mention, afterwards, the people were back to normal, and we ran into that girly-man, Noo--OW! *gets whapped on the head by Noon*
Noon: Let that be a lesson to you... for the 50th time.
Palsis: *from the stairs* Hey gang, dinner's on. What're you all doing down there anyway?
Synbios: Food! I'm starved!
Julian: Odd, I'm not very hungry.
Masqurin: Maybe it's because you're constantly drinking...
Julian: Hey, when you live with a drunk, you become a drunk. Boy, that Alan could drink...
Palsis: You guys better hurry up! Gracia's going at it like there's no tommorrow!
*Everyone proceeds to stampede to the dinner hall*
~End
~Lena, Julian no Miko
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